Just a quick post to recommend the following article: "Over Sexualized Muslim Men Syndrome."
Don't let the title put you off. Before anyone says anything, yes I know it works both ways: Muslim women are just as bad *sometimes* as Muslim men; and no, I'm not a feminist.
Read away!
Monday, January 22, 2007
Friday, January 19, 2007
Forgive and Forget
I'm trying to get my head around the saying "forgive and forget." To put it simply, I don't understand how the two can go hand-in-hand, unless applied to a trivial situation which really bears no real consequence on life. But the situations that really hurt are different.
Forgiveness isn't something I find too difficult to partake in if someone apologises for whatever reason. Gandhi said that "forgiveness is the attribute of the strong," probably because it takes more of an effort to forgive someone than it does to bear a grudge against them. Unfortunately, as I've learnt from experience, grudges and the bitterness that ensue can consume people. It's like a cancer in the heart, that destroys the love that you may have felt for that person, and eventually anyone that may associate with them. Forgiveness is the only cure to this bitterness, and the earlier it's put into practice, the easier it is to rid one's heart of the cancer.
But to associate forgiveness with forgetting is illogical to me. If someone has the potential to hurt someone else, and willingly, then how can one forget their capacity to do so? For example, in Islamic law, if someone bears false witness, then their testimony is never to be trusted again; Their reputation as a liar haunts them forever, whether or not they have repented and "mended their ways" so to speak. The reason I have personally derived for this is quite simple: Once someone has recognised their ability to practice the art of lying, then the only person that can stop them from doing so is themselves. If they put it into practice once, then there is nothing to ensure that they won't again, except their own conviction. And seeing as none of us know the intentions of another, we can only trust what someone has the potential of being like from the actions that they undertake.
So back to forgetting; If I have found out for example, that my friend has lied to me, then although I might forgive them for doing so, I won't forget that they have the capacity to lie; If for no other reason, than to make sure I've learnt my lesson of what they are capable of.
After everything that's happened over this past academic year, unfortunately this is what I've had to learn:
Forgetting turns foes into friends and friends into foes. Forgiving shouldn't necessarily mean forgetting.
Any objections?
Forgiveness isn't something I find too difficult to partake in if someone apologises for whatever reason. Gandhi said that "forgiveness is the attribute of the strong," probably because it takes more of an effort to forgive someone than it does to bear a grudge against them. Unfortunately, as I've learnt from experience, grudges and the bitterness that ensue can consume people. It's like a cancer in the heart, that destroys the love that you may have felt for that person, and eventually anyone that may associate with them. Forgiveness is the only cure to this bitterness, and the earlier it's put into practice, the easier it is to rid one's heart of the cancer.
But to associate forgiveness with forgetting is illogical to me. If someone has the potential to hurt someone else, and willingly, then how can one forget their capacity to do so? For example, in Islamic law, if someone bears false witness, then their testimony is never to be trusted again; Their reputation as a liar haunts them forever, whether or not they have repented and "mended their ways" so to speak. The reason I have personally derived for this is quite simple: Once someone has recognised their ability to practice the art of lying, then the only person that can stop them from doing so is themselves. If they put it into practice once, then there is nothing to ensure that they won't again, except their own conviction. And seeing as none of us know the intentions of another, we can only trust what someone has the potential of being like from the actions that they undertake.
So back to forgetting; If I have found out for example, that my friend has lied to me, then although I might forgive them for doing so, I won't forget that they have the capacity to lie; If for no other reason, than to make sure I've learnt my lesson of what they are capable of.
After everything that's happened over this past academic year, unfortunately this is what I've had to learn:
Forgetting turns foes into friends and friends into foes. Forgiving shouldn't necessarily mean forgetting.
Any objections?
Saturday, January 13, 2007
Procrastination is the Thief of Time
"Procrastination is the thief of time" was what a wise fortune cookie told me once. But is it really daylight robbery when you end up doing something more creative than whatever you're procrastinating from?
This is what I get up to when I'm procrastinating:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/desimonkey/
This is what I get up to when I'm procrastinating:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/desimonkey/
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)